Where I've Been; Where I'm Going

Most folks who follow me on Facebook already know that the last couple of weeks have been consumed with the details and grief of my daughter’s death. Rachel, who had outlived the doctors’ prognosis by almost twenty years, was twenty-eight. Her memorial service was on March 5^th, a celebration of Rachel’s life that drew far more people than I expected.

This was a blessing, making it a day full of hugs, reassurances of love, and plans to come. Reminders that there is still a future for the rest of us can make such a time a touch easier.

Rachel was a true joy to be around, and I will miss her more than I can say. Going on with life will not be easy, as anyone who’s experienced great loss knows all too well. I walked a similar path myself, only 16 months ago, when my mother died. Six months passed before I began to write about her life, remembering especially what she’d left behind: her wisdom, practicality, faith, and integrity, along with a mountain of handmade quilts.

As all of those things began to weave together, her legacy formed clearly in my mind, and I began to write devotionals about Mother. The result was a book, My Mother’s Quilts, which releases tomorrow, March 8^th…only three days after Rachel’s memorial service. My author’s copies of the book arrived at my house the day Rachel died.

It reminds me of an event a few years ago, when I called my writer-friend Krista Phillips to offer her a contract on a book. My call came around the same time that she found out that her youngest daughter needed heart surgery to survive. It put the whole “publishing thing” into perspective for her…and me.

Perspective: That life is filled with extraordinary goodness and unbelievable sadness…and that God will help us through all of it, with strength and wisdom. He will guide us on the paths forward, even as our steps wander uncertainly.

My grief is still raw and unpredictable…but I also want to honor and respect those who have stood beside me. So, yes, I will try now to focus on deadlines and marketing, which are a solace as well as a responsibility. And the Lord, who gave me this gift that has gotten me through so much as well as providing a way for me to honor all those who have gone before.